I seriously can’t believe that I have been on GAPS for six months now. That is mind blowing. I have never stuck with something for so long.
(Okay, if we’re going to be honest, there were two moments this past month when I took a sample of something that wasn’t GAPS. I even have had gluten. But I still consider what I have done these past months a success and I am so proud of myself.)
This month was kinda all over the place. I entered the month feeling great, and spent a good chunk of it feeling that way. But I also experienced a lot of anxiety around food and life. At one point, I acknowledged that I had an unhealthy relationship with food. This stirred up a lot of emotions, and after many days of crying, I walked up to my husband and said, “I have an eating disorder.”
This was hard, but was a huge step forward for me. I recognized that I was relying too heavily on my husband, and I started seeing a therapist. I have made an effort to be more mindful of my eating. I have had some really great successes. I still have a long way to go, and my anxiety about food is still there, but I am seeing progress and that means a lot.